Remember when your troubled teenager was just a little boy or girl, and one day you might catch him or her taking a crayon and scribbling all over your white walls. You’d talk to them about it and then you’d realize that they wanted some attention. Or maybe they were angry at you because you scolded them the other day. Well, when that little boy or girl grows into a teenager, they probably won’t be reaching for crayons anymore to express their angst or call for attention.
If your troubled teen has been messing around the house and ruining some of your possessions, or maybe messing up his/her own room with symbols on the walls or words of profanity, then this outward destruction may be signs of inner teen turmoil.
Your teenager may even be reprimanded at school for destruction of property or graffiti on school property. If this is the case of course you need to face your teen’s problem, not just what one may see with the eye, but what the real issue is behind this outward destruction. This won’t be an easy task.
The mere fact that your troubled teen has resorted to an outward manifestation of inner turmoil such as graffiti or destruction of property, shows that he/she is having difficulty facing his/her issues head on. If you are having second thoughts about taking on your teenager’s sensitive state on your own, it may be a good idea to contact a professional. You may try to set up a meeting with a counselor for your teen. If both the counselor and you find that this arrangement is productive for your teenager, then counseling may just be your way to your teen’s inner turmoil.
If you prefer a more personal approach, why not talk to your teen yourself? Just be wary of his/her sensitive “buttons.” If you are already aware of certain delicate topics with your teen, don’t try and push his/her buttons in order to get answers. Instead, you may try to brush past them gently while gauging your teenager’s reaction.
If it seems safe to go on, you may opt to tackle the subject in more detail. But if you notice warning signs in his/her facial demeanor or manner of speaking, then this is a clear warning to back off. You may decide to leave these delicate topics for a professional counselor or program in the future.
Once your teen tackles the real issue behind his/her outward destructive behavior, the graffiti will disappear on its own. And just as he/she will be rid of inner turmoil, so will the walls or property around him/her be clear once more.
